Please stop here if you are offended by "foul" language.
If you need a smile and choose to continue to read, please note the following:
- NO. In support of my mortified mother, my mother did NOT raise me to talk like this.
- YES. I DID - I REALLY DID send this to the OWNER of the franchise. (Haven't you ever really wanted to complain about something that made you feel uncomfortable but you were too embarrassed to explain it the only way that could truly illustrate your annoyance!?)
- The names of the accused have been withheld (Come on! I'm not THAT evil. BUT if I go back next time and it hasn't been resolved, stay tuned - 'cause I'll even post a MAP of the location!)
- I waited until I got to the HOME DEPOT to go to the bathroom almost THREE HOURS after I initially arrived at the dealership - ladies, THAT'S how bad it was!
- YES. I got a prompt reply. Mortified apology. Commitment to discuss at length during their weekly Management Meeting. (Laughing uncontrollably! Imagine THAT conversation!) And a commitment to rectify the situation.
- YES. I am personally familiar with the "condition" that I am referring to - I am proud NOT to be a Nun :o)
THE LETTER - (This letter has been modified from it's original version. The original letter was written with my Blackberry, and let's face it, we're still a ways from publishing "Pulitzer" material by thumbs!)
I hope this finds you well. I am currently sitting in your Service Waiting Area as my car is being serviced, and I couldn't help reaching out to you in my disappointment.
I purchased my vehicle from your dealership last August and my fiance purchased another this January.
We had hoped that this would be the start of a "breath-taking" relationship!
This is the second time I've brought my car in for routine service - about my 6th visit to your showroom.
At each visit, I have complained to our salesman, the Sales Manager who turned bright shades of red even through his dark skin tone, as well as the young women at the cashier's desk.
Each time, I've been assured that my complaint would be addressed before my next visit and six times later, I'm STILL completely disgusted!
I am disgusted at the Ladies Bathroom!
The first time my fiance and I both left the adjoining bathrooms we looked each other and said
"it smells like sweaty testicles!". (The language wasn't quite as P.C.)
Perhaps it is just a confirmation of our belief that we are soul mates that we both cried,
"SWEATY BALLS!" out in unison!
Alas, as I have learned in my previous FIVE complaints to members of your staff, I am not the first or several dozen-th person to bring the "sweaty balls"- stench and unwelcoming bathroom to the attention of members of your management.
In fact, on several of those occasions, along with fits of laughter at my bluntness, I have been encouraged by the management to share my frank review to other members of your staff who exclaimed,
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT SMELLS LIKE!"
Although I am proud to have been accepted as one of your sweaty guys in the dealership-locker-room, that is not the response you should be proud of!
I am also a woman business owner and I am appalled that a business owned proudly by such successful women would allow what, as a woman, you'd understand, more than anything else - that the condition of your bathroom, is an indication of the service one would expect in your establishment!
As I look around in the showroom at 3:09pm, there are only TWO male customers and EIGHT women and even a child!
I would be mortified to let MY child in that bathroom!
You should be ashamed!
Where's the Clorox?
Perhaps a Reed Diffuser or two?!
While I'm at it, the stalls don't even have a hook or shelf to place a purse or jacket!
I am hoping that by reaching out to you, that FINALLY my complaints will be heard and something will be done!
I hope to hear from you soon and that action will be taken to make visiting the "water closet" in your establishment fair better than an "out house!"
(hoping for some fresh air)
siempre - dorana
UPDATE: Yoda had his oil changed last week and excitedly reported:
"There's a pretty plant in the bathroom! And there's new air fresheners!
Now it smells like SWEATY BALLS WITH PERFUME!"
I think I might have to post that map...